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Fall in love with a psychotherapist

Fall in love with a psychotherapist

Initially, it is worth saying that it is normal to fall in love with a therapist, sympathize with him, feel attracted to him. Think for yourself, the psychotherapist listens to us attentively, he does not condemn us and treat us impartially, he is attentive and caring, he accepts us as we are, he supports and teaches us to be ourselves. Sometimes a psychotherapist is simply beautiful, and sometimes a psychotherapist may be the only man (woman) with whom we have a “relationship”.

Against the background of all this, a natural attraction to such a person may arise, and he may seem to us to be just the perfect partner. The most interesting thing is that we see only a small fragment from the life of a psychotherapist, so to speak, his best version, and at that moment our idealization of this person can reach its apogee. The rest of the time, he (she) is just an ordinary person, with his own fears and desires, with problems and joys, and maybe he is not like him outside the office.


If you see yourself in this situation and you really have a craving for your therapist, you can stop and say to yourself: - Yes, I definitely feel something for him, I like him, and that's fine. The thing is that I can be understood and accepted here and it relaxes me a lot, captivates. It is possible that these feelings appear from here, when I get exactly what I need so much, and it is he who gives it to me. But this is only part of psychotherapy. This is just psychotherapy.

An important factor that enhances our sexual desire is the dominance of sex and sexual images in our modern society. We live in times soaked through with sex, eroticism and attraction.

Also important is the fact that all this attraction usually does not have a direct way out and often turns into shame. Huge energy cannot find a way out, it is transformed, it puts pressure on us and, when conditions become safe, it rushes out in its most unexpected manifestations. In a therapeutic relationship where there is warmth and understanding, shame ceases to dominate our behavior, and it can quickly be replaced by sexual desire.

It's safe here, you can be in love.

If your therapist is experienced and a good therapeutic relationship can indicate to experience, then this attraction will be transformed into a deeper connection between the client and the therapist and will be directed towards a deeper understanding of the client himself. There are many ways to develop a situation where therapists are confronted with sexual attraction by patients, and here is one of these ways: - I want to say thank you for sharing your feelings for me, and I understand what it is ) sensitive (sensitive).

Well, I propose that we work with this energy, which is breaking out, and I want to say that sexual relations in therapy between the client and the therapist are excluded, as well as meetings outside the office. This understanding will help establish strong boundaries in the therapeutic relationship. Next, it is worth clarifying to the client the essence of sexual energy and how to deal with it.

Sex energy in some way is the energy of our life. Many believe that if we have sexual energy (energy that has a sexual origin), then we must definitely spend it on sex, in one or another of its manifestations.But if we remove the label "sexy", then we get just the vital energy that we can simply feel in our body. This is a new way to use it, just to be with her and feel alive.

Thus, we are going from a sexually excited state to a “live” state. It may not be easy to switch, but it allows us to choose a new register of our life, a new choice on the old energy. It is warm therapeutic relationships with good borders that will help us to get to know this new kind of energy in us, to feel alive, and perhaps, to direct this energy to creativity.

In any case, facing all of the above, we enrich our experience, become clearer to ourselves and others. And it's worth it!

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